the long term benefits of an emotional crisis

I’m writing today over at Segullah.

Despite feeling extremely vulnerable, I’m proud of what I’ve written. I’m especially proud of Ben for encouraging me to write about his anxiety this past year. The more we speak openly, the more we can help others.

If you read this blog regularly, you see happy, smiling images of our family. Those are absolutely genuine. If anything, we are more joyous and more loving than I can portray (and Xander is even better looking in person). A great deal of our contentment stems from hard times where we work together. We’re honest with each other, let people cry, and get mad; we let people just BE. Our family bond creates a little haven from the world. The rest of humanity might kick and shove you, but it’s not OK at home.

Oh wow, I just came up with the perfect illustration.




Some things we’ve learned for both ruminating and panic attacks:

  1. When you start to obsess over something or feel panicky, get up and move. Do something else. Anything else. Bake cookies, play Angry Birds, listen to an audio book (my personal favorite).
  2. Make exercise a priority. Every running group I’ve ever joined joked that it was group therapy. I always took that free therapy for granted until I couldn’t run anymore and learned it was real.
  3.  Get help! Discuss your feelings with your family and friends. If you feel progressively worse, call a doctor.

Have you seen this TED talk? Why We All Need to Practice Emotional First Aid. He compares telling someone with depression to “just shake it off” the same as telling someone with a broken leg “just shake it off.”

November 18, 2015
November 21, 2015



  1. jen

    November 20, 2015

    I find that a walk helps me when I get stuck in a rumination spiral.

    I also can’t stress the importance of medication if that’s what it takes. Mine keeps me functional.

  2. catania

    November 23, 2015

    I have started meditating this year. I have always prayed, but now it is more thoughtful. I keep my back straight, breathe deeply, and keep a soft smile. I spend quite a bit of time doing this, and it has been AMAZING. Life changing.

    It can be hard to sit still – especially if you have any kind of anxiety, but it really is completely life changing. For me, it has “changed the night to day.”

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